When does a girl turn into a woman?
she develops hips and buds of breasts? When her periods start? When
her interest increases in the opposite or same sex?
it come later? When she commits to one person? With this ring, I
leave the girl and become a wife...
it's when she falls pregnant for the first time? When she becomes a
mother? When that fierce love makes everything pale? Makes everything
fade as the child takes centre-stage.
womanhood every little girl's destiny or do you attain it by deed?
never make it? Never turn from a downy duckling into an elegant swan?
you're straight and flat, you're not womanly, you're boyish. If
you're single, choosing to remain uncoupled or unmarried, you must be
frigid or a lesbian. If you're child-free, then secretly you must be
a cold-hearted killer.
fertile and sexy. She must wear figure hugging clothes, dare to bare,
leave nothing to the imagination, wear knee-high leather boots or
tottering heels. She must swish her hair or be happy to prance around
in her underwear all the time. Have a unconcealed fetish for
cosmetics, handbags and shoes. She must be sweet and kind, but in the
right situation be unafraid to speak her mind.
this list is not exhaustive. It's amended, added to with every new
this speaker? A female in her 30s who's still trying to figure out
all of the above. A female who hasn't had that inevitable fairy tale
ending. A female who if suddenly addressed as 'woman' would
automatically look behind her.
duckling never turned into the swan. The girl not yet a woman. A
girl-woman who accepts her female gender, but declines the invite to
join her more worldly sisters. A part of her wondering if their
invite is spiteful? For regardless of the passing years, she's
eternally defined as 'young' and 'girl'. She sees their measuring
glances and reads their minds: Plank, probably barren, unwomanly. No
competition here as she's so obviously not the conventional type.
men look through her, see her as a younger sister or daughter even if
she's older. A 30-plus adolescent who appears to them to need a man's
protection. Brotherly, fatherly behaviour. But she doesn't care for
being undesired is marginally safer. Others try to pin her down, but
can't. They assume she leads a wild secret life and that her
innocence is just a school girl act – it's not.
female who's always led a sheltered life does not leap to womanhood.
She'll run until she's exhausted or pricks her finger on a spindle.
The onset of maturity delayed as time collapses and trauma at that
precarious pubescent stage shoots up an invisible wall. Trauma that
cuts like a knife and changes how she sees herself and how she thinks
others perceive her.
go by, she forgives, but she can't forget and the thicket has grown
impenetrable. There's nobody closed in with her and the light is too
dark to allow anybody in. It's easier to stay behind that invisible
wall and avoid the deep and meaningful, although she enjoys peeping
over. Spends her solitary life day-dreaming that someday she'll know
what it's like to not be a girl-woman.